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Off to Nerja March 26, 2009

Posted by Rambling Man in General Bloggery.
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It is with great delight that I take to the skies this afternoon as I jet off to Nerja to attend a mate’s wedding. Unfortunately, Mrs. Rambling Man and the kiddies are not accompanying me on this occasion as we couldn’t get anyone to mind aforementioned bundles of trouble delight.

It’s one of those quick 2 day jaunts because you can’t afford to stay any longer and so are left feeling completely unprepared and not really allowing yourself to realise that in 6 hours or so I’ll be sitting on a balcony, surrounded by the best friends I’ve ever had, drinking cerveza to “bate the band” !   Now I am really starting to get excited !

I do have a slight clothing dilemma to get around before I jump in the car and drive to Shannon airport – the groom just texted to say it’s 26 degrees and all’s gubbins here has packed is sensible trousers and no shorts ! So I’ll have to dash home and destroy the wardrobe before heading off and hope that I don’t get stuck in traffic in the worse place in Ireland for chaos – Tipperary town !

Catch you on the flip side … I’m off to cut one of those Brian Cowen pictures out of the paper and post it on the wall of the airpalne jacks !  That should literally scare the sh*t out of a few flyers …

Ya wha ? March 19, 2009

Posted by Rambling Man in General Bloggery.
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Were you ever “drownded wet” ? March 15, 2009

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“I’m drownded wet !!” spluttered my colleague, as he finally found cover from the torrential rain filled day we had yesterday. “Drownded feckin’ wet !”, says he struggling with a sweater that has shrunk at least one size and is a battle with dexterity and modesty to remove, such is its water retention capacity.

Interesting choice of phrase don’t you think ? and perhaps one that is all too familiar to the average Irish person, as most of us are most obsessed with the weather or the lack of the good sort of same … but I wonder if I was to say that to a native of an area more accustomed to swimming pools than swimming pool sized potholes.

“You’re what ?” – “I’m drownded !”

Presumably the word is some sort of bastardisation of the word ‘drowned’ which as it happens involves being very wet at some stage during its unfortunate process.

So you’re as wet as you would be if you were drowned ?? or theres so much rain falling that you could perhaps drown in it ?

Never being ones for exaggeration I think the first person that came up with this phrase knew that people at large would go for it, because after all, theres no point being caught out in the rain (wet rain at that!) if you can’t come in out of it and complain to someone about its how wet it was !

drownded wet, noun, pr. drownded wet
drownded, noun, pr. drown-ded

Meaning being wet from rain or other watery substances to the degree that you might as well have rolled around in a filled bath to start with.

Cowen fiddles while Ireland burns March 13, 2009

Posted by Rambling Man in Ireland & the Irish.
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Well I’m just shocked, devastated, feeling betrayed and dismayed all at the one time !  It seems our government, in their limitless wisdom and from whatever planet they are currently on, have seen fit to give some of the number a €3,000 pay rise !

A rise !  Yes that’s right folks – when people are losing their jobs and livelihoods all over the place, pension levies, income tax increases and all manner of talk about other tax increases abound, the politicians are giving themselves MORE money.  Cowen and his cronies are fiddling – in all senses of the word – while Ireland literally burns before them.

So here are my addled thoughts on the matter …

1) If you – Joe and Josephine Citizen – could get away with it, would you do it too ?
2) Do we care enough to do anything about this sort of lark ?
3) Why do I have the feeling that Fianna Fáil will not do that badly in the June local elections after all ?

Just questions I would like the answers to, from ordinary members of the public who have been hit by the recession.  “Oh it’s terrible isn’t it?” says a colleague of mine this morning, “The neck on them !” … but what are we going to DO about it ?  Nothing … because we don’t care enough, is the answer.

I keep hearing “Sure what’s the alternative ?”  Fine Gael and Labour are not better – Do you know what ? – you’re probably right but the alternative is what the alternative is – a bloody alternative !  I would rather teach these fuckers in government a lesson by voting in another shower of political point scoring incompetents, than by leaving the current kleptocracy* in place !    You then hurt them in the only place they know … in the ballot box.

So as we nurse yet another sore arse this morning (from being ridden solid), I have a bone to pick with the man I voted for.  Senator John Paul Phelan of Kilkenny.  The Irish Independent rang him (and the others) getting this pay rise yesterday to see if they were going to accept it, given the harrowing circumstances many find themselves in … and his answer will, I hope, come back to burn the fingers off him !  He was accepting the pay rise, he told the paper, because … wait for it … he wants “a level playing field” !

So, there you have it – our politicians are so delusional that they think by taking a pay rise in a time of unbridled and unprecedented economic turmoil (not to mention the rest of us losing money), they are contributing to a “level playing field” by taking a rise !  They get more – we get less – yes, only in Ireland is that “level”.

Mr.Phelan, I am devastated that I voted for you and convinced my wife to do the same – I actually met you on the hustings and you convinced me you had some good ideas … Any chance you’d give me a bit of the €3,000 to make up for the cuts in wages I’ve been battling with – especially since now my wife is out of work ?  No ?  Thought not !

Still, a vote lost here and there won’t do you any harm will it ?  We’ll see at the next election !

I’m thinking of writing to your party leader – Enda Kenny – a man I’ve always admired, to tell him of my troubles – but he’s on 17 days holidays for St.Patrick’s Day and not available !  That’s right – 17 !!  We get one day off – and they get 17 !

I think if I could get away with it, I’d ride the lot of ye too !

* kleptocracy – a brilliant word, stolen from the talented Devin.

And the words flowed like … porridge March 12, 2009

Posted by Rambling Man in General Bloggery, Ireland & the Irish.

So as part of my job I have to do a bit of proofreading and editing and so forth … and it can be a tiresome task ! That’s putting it mildly !

So it is with great disdain that I see the deterioration of the English language on displays, billboards, packaging and so on … not only in terms of spelling, grammar and writing (niteclub being my personal non-favourite) but also in terms of semantics … what the hell does half of it mean !

It appears that the more wordy, stuffy and highfalutin the better !  Meaning – no need for it !   Brevity – no need for it !  Get straight to the point – ah come on now !

Hereunder are some of my favourites:

– “Carved ham” – the type you get in packets in the supermarket … isn’t all ham carved or cut in some way before it gets to the mouth ?  Unless you get served a bit, fat lump of meat that has had no processing …

– “Purpose built apartments” – I know !  Let’s build these apartments specifically to be … erm … apartments !!

– “Selected potatoes” – seen recently on a bag of spuds from Tesco !  Let’s see now – yes, take that one there … mmm…  but not that one … those two look OK !  It’s a wonder there aren’t thousands of spud selector jobs being created !

– “No Added Sugar” – my personal favourite – nobody can tell me exactly what it means – my best guess is that it means there is no extra sugar added to the sugar that the product already contains !

Do these fellas who sit there thinking up the slogans and branding for the various products think that we are stupid enough to go for the “lovingly carved roast beef” labels or are more likely to buy a “purpose built” apartment than one say, that was just plain built !

Why use one sentence or phrase when 4 will do nicely !!

Can’t we all just … March 11, 2009

Posted by Rambling Man in General Bloggery.
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Can’t we all just … go back to pretending that all the money still exists ?!

I mean that’s what the banks and politicians were doing in the first place !

Murder in Northern Ireland March 10, 2009

Posted by Rambling Man in General Bloggery.

Our sympathies must go out to the families and friends of the 3 men shot dead in Northern Ireland over the past few days. Such acts of criminality and wanton violence are something nobody on this island should stand for.

The people who did this are cowards … and the people who harbour them and don’t talk to the police are also as cowardly.

They sully the name of Ireland with their acts – they sully our flag when they hang it, tattered, from lampposts. They sully our nation and our nationality in the eyes of the world and if they think that by carrying out these terrible acts they will somehow end up in a paradise called United Ireland then they are very much mistaken.

We don’t want you ! The minute you took up arms and harmed another human you lost the right to call yourself Irish – we neither want you or care about you because of what you have done.

Shame …

Irony – Irish style March 4, 2009

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Does anyone find it ironic that if you’re a non-Irish speaker and looked at the name of our governing party, it reads Fianna FAIL ?!

“Fail” is right – thanks to the mother-in-law for this one … she thought it was most amusing … it would be if it wasn’t so apt !