My Only Lions Test July 3, 2009

My Only Lions Test

by the Rambling Man

Last night I dreamed a lovely dream, like I’ve never dreamed before
I dreamed I was a Lion and touched down the winning score
their backline was a little flat, plain for all to see
As I chased down the grubber kick by the girl who makes the tea

I cross and dived, just left of post and smothered the rugby ball
three lads dived too, all red clad men, waiting for the call
the referee he raised his hand and we were in the lead
twas only then I realised, to pee I had a need !

I walked past Shane Williams (!), who was lining up the kick
and I remember thinking, Jaysis O’Gara must be sick
and then in that dreamlike way, the pitch was nowhere to be seen
I had obviously found the toilet, just what could it mean ?

Then the rest of the team were heading home and making for the bus
I was taking their congratulations, amidst the winning fuss
Darren Clarke shook my hand, for he had played scrum half
and the man that runs our golf shop, also joined the laugh

At last as I began to wake, I realised I was going mad
Bull Hayes was walking round my room, looking really sad
the local man who delivers milk had just blocked his clearance down
and was charging over the line again, sliding on the ground
the milkman wore a dark green shirt, shattering all our hope
and the Lions had lost my only test. I dream like such a dope !